As I sat with my chicken dinner tonight next to a couple of college students, I couldn’t help overhear the conversation they were having.  They were reading a text message that the boy had received from an apparent ex-girlfriend.  The text went on to tell the boy how completely, “shallow and insecure” he was.  There was a number of expletives in describing the boy’s mental state and his prowess in the bedroom, all of which were not flattering.

It’s always interesting to me, with all of the means of modern communication available, how often I myself resort to text messages.  My busy schedule involving strange hours, sometimes text messages are just the easiest and simplest way to get a message to it’s hopeful destination.  Still, in this modern age, it seems that we have traded actual connections with people for the “McDonald’s Happy Meal Form” of talking – we like our dinners fast and our conversations even faster.  160 characters rarely sum up anyone’s feelings and are a poor substitute for, what our ancestors used to do, and that’s actually talk face-to-face.  Wow, remember those days?

According to Nokia, nearly 70% of people send at least 1 text message per day.  I’m not saying that text messaging doesn’t have it’s value – it does.  As the quick form of getting a short important message to a friend or colleague, there’s nothing better.  The problem is when people begin substituting “texting” for actually “connecting” – and we wonder why we sometimes feel so isolated.

It’s even worse when you think of how cowardly a text message is for “negative” communication.  Remember when Britney Spears informed Kevin Federline she was divorcing him via text.  A commitment they made face-to-face was easily dissolved by a simple 160-character message to his cell phone.  I believe a face-to-face commitment deserves a face-to-face resolution – we’ve got to get back to the days of looking someone in the eye and really letting them have it: the good, the bad, and the virtually ugly.  It’s too easy to hide behind our cell phones and our computers and pretend like we are truly connecting with someone – we aren’t.  Case-in-point, my mother discovered text messaging a couple years ago (God Bless Her) and now our preferred method of communication seems to be the text message.  The good news is we text way more than we ever called each other – the bad news is, now we have little reason to call.  Well, little reason except for the simple process of “connecting.”

I’m writing this rant because I am part of the problem.  I’m guilty as hell of wasting my own precious connections on a series of text messages and twitter updates, e-mails and emoticons.  That’s why, as I type this, I’m also making a list of things I need to pack.  Tomorrow night I load up my car and drive the 8 hours to my parent’s house where I will spend a couple days, for no other reason than just to hang out, visit, and talk face-to-face, just like our ancestors did.

Oh, s#%t – I just remembered I need to text my mom and tell her I’m coming.

The Hierarchy of Modern Communication —
(Listed from “Most to Least” Connected)

• Face to Face.  Talking, touching, intimate.
• Phones.  Voice to voice contact.
• Mailed Letters – the intimate, thoughtful, written word.
• E-mails, Chat Services, Facebook, Myspace – the sterile written word, in real-time.
• Text Messages, Twitter Updates – 160 characters of modern connection

One final thought – I’ve started scheduling Sunday nights as my ‘call-people’ night.  It was nice.  I had my first one on Sunday and caught up with a couple old friends.  It felt good.