Is it just me, or do all parents feel this way? I’m impatient. I want to know what the sex of my baby is and I want to know now. What are we naming him… or her? Do I buy a little baseball glove or am I going to be buying barbie dolls? Do I paint the room pink or blue? Do I need to worry about one boy, or EVERY boy? Are we having a Grayson or a Reese? Or maybe a hermaphrodite named “Grecian?” Regardless, I’ll love him or her the same, just wanting to make some plans.

When our last ultrasound was moved to “next” Friday, I couldn’t wait anymore. I needed information. I ran down to my local Walgreens and purchased the magic “Intelligender” test, which my sister recommended. The cool thing about this test is that it comes with a magic unicorn* that leaps out of the box, jumps around the pregnant mother’s belly, and then exclaims, “He-Haw, you are having a baby boy named Filliberto!” It then gives you a million dollars and teaches the two of you a handful of better love-making techniques for expecting couples, before it leaps off into the night spelling your child’s name with stardust across the sky.

Unfortunately, the test proved to be complete waste of $40 since the magic unicorn* was dead when we opened the box. Not to mention, the urine we added to the test just looked like urine. No color change (the funny thing is that the instructions says if you don’t see any change in color in the urine, then it’s likely a girl… Way to cover your bases Intelligender).

*Magic Unicorn Not Actually Included.
A quick check of the Chinese Astrological calendar says that we are having a girl. So, two out of two myths pointed in that direction. On the other hand, the plate of chicken bones that I asked said we are having a baby chicken. I’m pretty sure that one is wrong.

We have our next ultrasound scheduled this Friday, so I expect that I will be posting more information about the baby’s gender then. In the meantime, we’ve been buying gender neutral things that are needed, like the Graco base for the baby carrier for my car and this awesome designer daddy diaper bag, which I believe you’ll agree is a must have for sexy daddies this season.

Intelligender

babybag

Written by

Kevin Burdick is a healthcare IT and social networking consultant, a national touring musician, a nationally recognized speaker, and a leader of a unique non-profit that helps grieving families get headstones for their angel babies. Take a few minutes and explore the many lives of Kevin.

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